Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Sunday, November 27, 2005
I sometimes buy Simple Living magazine, because I lust after the cover art.
If you came over to my house to play and broke my ________________ crayon, I'd be a little bit mad at you forever. Um....doesn't apply to me. To my way of thinking, now I have two!
The colour institutional green should only be used in fungal remedy packaging or if human waste were to be redesigned.
The colour blue that they use in the glass for that expensive bottled water makes my heart feel like it is full of happy kittens frolicking in a sunny, grassy meadow.
Japanese Anime makes me break out in gooberous pustules (or else I just don't like it, but I'm too nice to say it.)
I might get sick or die if I touch or ingest cilantro, or look at Tremors, that horrible movie.
Pokemon gives me the heebie jeebies and I might need to seek therapy if I even think about it further.
I love the feel of LL Bean flannel-lined jeans so much I have a primitive urge to stick some down my pants. Oops! Already there!
No one should have to watch me eat lobster, because really If I were eating some in private, I'd be quite a pig about it. Ummmmmm.
I would rather chew tinfoil and shave my head with a cheese grater than eat gefillte fish.
I DO follow recipes because otherwise I leave important things out, but I do improvise once I know one pretty well.
For Marla, "White Shoulders" perfume will always smell like her laid-out dead grandmother. I feel that way about tea roses.
If I could, I'd perfume my own farts and those of my loved ones with the scent of chocolate.
I have TOO MANY/TOO MUCH OF computers in the house, and not enough clothes to wear on cold weekends. I mean seriously, I've got 3 casual shirts and 2 pairs of non-business pants.
Gadgets are for EVERYBODY!
When people have kind, sweet and nice things about me, they're usually talking about Muffin Man.
I can't be upset if people dis me about my driving, because it's true.
If I could have any talent in the world, I'd choose musical ability and use it to make people happy.
You are given an hour and twenty dollars to spend in one of these places, childfree. Choose one, or write your own:
A flea market, where you might find neat treasures and still have enough left over for some home made baked goods from that nice granny's table.
A picturesque pub, where a couple of great drinks and a nice tip might lead to some interesting conversations.
A craft show, because you really need to find a few more things made from twigs and yarn.
A gourmet food store, because food for the tummy is food for the soul.
A fancy and expensive boutique, because you'd rather have one lipstick from a great place than ten lipsticks from a dollar store.
Wherever! Whatever! Just give the twenty dollars to whomever's caring for the offspring so you can have more time to yourself!
And here's the last chance to make sure that you're not going to get a "Jelly of the Month" club membership when you're expecting your bonus for a swimming pool:
It is important to me that the items chosen for me are at least a little silly.
(Examples: respect my Wal-Mart boycott, are vegan, aren't made by child or sweatshop labour, can be stuffed down my pants)
If I could suggest that you read only one post from my archives, this would be it: Poop-Warning Contains Graphic Descriptions of Grossness
If I were to name the Holiday of my choice for this exchange, it would be: Christmas, even though I'm culturally Jewish, I'm Christmas's biggest fan. (Please feel free to make one up - but this is your chance to say "Um, I'm Jewish but that doesn't mean give me dreidels!" or "More Santa decorations please - I only have thirty-seven now." or "Winter and gifts yes; religious denominations, no - if only all cards could be like those politically correct corporate holiday wishes!" if you want to.)
Saturday, November 26, 2005
Muffin Man and his cousins watched Chicken Run (Wednesday), The Incredibles, and two Wallace and Gromit shorts (Thursday). The grownups all talked and ate and had a generally good time.
And MM was such a good boy on the trip that we bought him a bicycle as a reward. Now we just need to assemble it!
Hope you all had a lovely holiday as well.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Saturday, November 19, 2005
Friday, November 18, 2005
I think I need to explain that, aside from Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid to Ask, I hate watching Woody Allen act in movies (love his stand-up though!). Somehow he just grates on me like fingernails on a chalkboard. So I haven't marked any of his movies on this list. But I loved Alice, mostly because he let someone else play him.
Also, I'm disappointed that Young Frankenstein and The Twelve Chairs are not on this list. And Where is The Princess Bride?
* All About Eve (but I own it, how weird is that? I'm gonna have to get on the ball.)
* Annie Hall
* The Apartment
* Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
* Blazing Saddles
* Bringing Up Baby
* Broadcast News
* Le diner de con
* Dr. Strangelove: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
* Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
* Duck Soup
* Ferris Bueller's Day Off
* Four Weddings and a Funeral
* The General
* The Gold Rush
* Good Morning Vietnam
* The Graduate
* Groundhog Day (I can't believe Phantom hasn't seen this.)
* A Hard Day's Night
* His Girl Friday
* Kind Hearts and Coronets
* The Lady Killers
* Local Hero
* Monty Python's Life of Brian
* National Lampoon's Animal House
* The Odd Couple
* The Producers
* Raising Arizona
* Shaun of the Dead
* A Shot in the Dark
* Some Like it Hot (One of my all-time favorite movies. "...Like Jello on springs. I'm telling you it's a whole different sex!")
* Strictly Ballroom
* Sullivan's Travels
* There's Something About Mary
* This is Spinal Tap
* To Be or Not to Be
* Toy Story
* Les vacances de M. Hulot
* When Harry Met Sally...
* Withnail and I
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
It was five years ago. Perhaps almost to the day...I'll have to check. We heard that RHPS was going to be shown at a nearby college campus. It was going to start at the traditional time, so we planned to have a late supper and then go join the masses of costumed Washingtonians. Under my shirt, I was wearing a sparkly boustier for old-time's sake.
We went to an Indian restaurant. The food was good. We ate and talked. At about 10:00PM we left. We got into the car. We sat there. We looked at each other.
"Home?" I asked.
He agreed. We were asleep by the time the first tickets were being taken. All coolness stripped from me. Gone.
One year later, I was 6 months pregnant with Muffin Man.
Five years later, I'm wondering how old MM will be the first time he sees it. And will he be horrified or impressed that I used to be one of the
Will I ever let him see pictures of me with a spiral perm?
Monday, November 14, 2005
And there were.
And the lips were big
And the lips were red
And the lips sang...
Michael Renney was ill the day the earth stood still and he told us where we stand (On our feet!)
And Flash Gordon was there in silver underwear. Claude Raines was the Invisible Man (Out of sight!)
Then something went wrong for Faye Wray and King Kong they got caught in a cellular jam (Yay Jam!)
And then a mystic race, It Came From (Where?) Outer Space and this is how the message ran
Science fiction, double feature
Doctor X has built a creature
See androids fighting Brad and Janet
Anne Frances stars in Forbidden Planet
Oh oh oh oh oh
At the late night double feature picture show.
Yes...yes, my friends, it's true. I played Janet, I played Magenta, I played Columbia, and I played Frank. I did Frank very well, but I didn't really fit the costume...but you should have seen my "Sweet Transvestite", it was truly something to behold.
Ah, bright college days, eh? And do you know, 16 years later I can still recite the whole. flipping. movie.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Last night Muffin Man slept over at my sister-in-law's house and we celebrated. Dinner out. Breakfast out. Exploring old-town Herndon. Kvelling over our son and the outcome of the election.
I would say "yes" again in a New York minute.
Thursday, November 10, 2005
Please note the glasses. I'd like to say that Mr. Spock does have hair, even if this portrait makes him look bald.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
I can't tell you how stunning this is. Loudoun has traditionally been a Republican stronghold. That a Democrat has handily won this county is...well, I hope it points to a shift towards the center.
Go and vote.
I took Muffin Man to the polls with me this morning and we voted for Kaine, Poisson, Byrne, and Deeds. Also, we voted Yes on all the bond issues.
MM was fascinated by the cool scan-tron ballot. And he loved getting a sticker for watching mommy exercise her franchise.
If you are able to vote (registered, and legally of age) and don't go, then I say to you "PTHHHHHP!" There are people all over the world fighting and dying for a right that you are throwing away. Here in the US there are millions of people who are either disenfranchised or are facing huge hurdles to be able to vote. So get off your duff and act like a citizen.
Don't like any of the candidates? Aren't up on the issues? That's no excuse. Write in for someone who doesn't make you puke. Educate yourself.
This has been a public service announcement brought to you by Bloggers Against Self-Disenfranchisement.
Monday, November 07, 2005
Here is an early picture of Muffin Man's use of stickers as part of an on-going art-work. We call it "Sticker Door" and in just a few short months, it has overflowed onto the drawers of this dresser.
Stuck in the middle there is a clue about who we're voting for in tomorrow's election. If there is an election where you are tomorrow, go out and vote. APL, Corndog, genevieve and Angie - since you are all Virginia residents, this definitely applies to you!
Muffin Man agrees that I look great in them and decided to see what they could do for him.
Here he is, modelling the world's best boots.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Here is Muffin Man after a hard evening's work trick-or-treating.
He went as Captain Feathersword, with a concert-bought hat and sword (which he decided against carrying, in favor of his pumpkin bucket o' candy and his pumkin flashlight, hence the title of this post). The rest of his costume is made up of blue pants, white shirt (both courtesy The Gap) and a red quilted vest complete with yellow electrician's tape cut to resemble the Captain's Magic Buttons (he's got half-a-dozen).
This was only MM's second year trick-or-treating, but he was already leaving us behind at the curb and going off by himself to ring the door bell and shout "Trick-or-Treat!!!!" loudly enough for us to hear from the mail-boxes at the end of the drive-ways. I got so choaked up, my little boy is not so little anymore. After a few houses, I actually left him with his dad and went back to the house to greet the other neighborhood children.
When MM got tired, he came back to help give out candy, two to a customer. He took his job so seriously!!!
Halloween is definitely one of his top two favorite holidays!
Saturday, November 05, 2005
Maybe tomorrow? I can't say for sure. What I can say is I am still here and am keeping up with all your blogs, but just not keeping up much with my own.
Big hugs to you all and I'll update soon.