Saturday, June 14, 2008

Talking, once again, about the tatas

Bad body image day. I'm guessing I'll get a visit from the crimson tide tomorrow.
From the front, I seriously look ginormous.
l( )( )l

the little l's at the sides are the outer edges of my Olive Oyl arms.

But I realized the other day that from the side, I look much much smaller

l l l )

The three l's are supposed to be my back and Olive Oyl arms.

So the impact of my front-view is, in great part, due to the fact that the breasts mostly obscure my practically non-existent upper arms.

Not that G is not ginormous, it is. But G in combination with upper arms that have the same circumference as a soda can is...an odd pairing indeed.

Add in some narrowish shoulders and it's no wonder that I have a hard time buying clothes.

When I look at my front-view in the mirror I don't see a body, I see a collection of parts. It's like looking at branches, leaves, trunk and never seeing a tree.

When I look at myself in profile, I see myself as a whole. I am not a collage, I am a sculpture, made from one marble slab.

I'm 39. How old do I have to be to feel at peace with my body?

7 comments:

Ramblin' Red said...

(hugs)...

I no longer view it with disgust, but some humor. My gf and I were out the other day with our families and I was telling her that from the front, my birthing paunch looks like the butt of some little old lady got stuck to my stomach - it is wrinkly (stretch marks) and has a center crevice from my deep-seated navel, and thus looks like a mini-hiney.

When I told her that from the front, it looks like I am a double hourglass (because I'm broad at the bust, narrow[er] waist, broad hips, curve back in with the thighs, and out with the calves) - and then from the side profile, its also a double hourglass - because my bust coincides with backfat hanging over my bra, goes back in, then my ghetto booty and granny front-booty go out - and I've pretty much decided that my body is a squiggle shape in 3D. She said, "You know, bacon is shaped like that when it cooks," and we laughed and laughed that I'm bacon-shaped.

Our dh's were just amazed that we could talk and poke fun at it.

Phantom Scribbler said...

Ah, Liz, I sooooo hear you on this one. The skinny arms and narrow shoulders make a weird look for anything above a C cup -- or, at least, that's how I felt when it was me. I don't know what I would have done about it if I didn't settle back at C once nursing was done. But you deserve to feel at peace with your body. That's for sure.

Mummy/Crit said...

Ah yes, I know your pain here. I've been really happy with my body image while pregnant, which has been a novelty - to show it off, rather than cover it up. The breasts are causing some concern though - I can't find a bra to fit comfortably right now, either too big in the back, or too big in the cup. And as for my jelly-like belly...

debangel said...

Amen, sister! Narrow back, shoulders and arms? Check! Fricking Foolishly-large chest, check! Different time zones so as to prevent awesome shopping trip with Liz..check =( Waahhh!!

I think we start to accept the way our bodies look about .25 seconds before something else starts to go, LOL

Andrea said...

I'll let you know if I ever figure out when we get to consider ourselves good enough the way we are. It's amazing how restrictive the ideal of the 'perfect body' is--I don't think anyone gets to have it.

Sue said...

(((Liz)))

I wish I knew when that magic time comes when we look at our bodies and feel nothing but adoration and peace. I'm working on it. I am getting better at looking at my body nekkid without wincing. I look at my c-section scars now and smile because of the two fine young men who were born out of those marks.

By the time I'm 80, I'll freakin' love myself.

purple_kangaroo said...

((Liz)) . . . I can relate. I look at myself and see primarily scrawny arms, large hips and nearly non-existent tatas. Now that Ebee has been down to nursing about once a day for several months, my bre@sts have almost disappeared . . . I'm back to something like a Nearly A size. Which is also hard to find a blouse to fit. Sigh.

I think it would be easier to love our bodies unconditionally if it were easier to find fabulous clothes that actually fit.