Yesterday was blogging for LGBT families day...and I didn't know it.

But unrelatedly, Muffin Man came home from school with this poem he'd written, that he's going to read in front of the whole middle school later this week.

I'm so proud of him for standing up for his friends and the members of our family who are LGBT. I'm so proud of  him for already being the person I hoped he'd be when I imagined him as a grown-up.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get some dust out of my eye. Talk among yourselves. And check out Crunchy Granola's post from yesterday.

Remembering

Today the sky is as blue as it was 11 years ago. I've written about that day many times, but the truth is that I remember it most on days like today, when the sky is blue and cloudless and the air has that taste of Fall.

On days like today, I look up at the contrails left by the planes flying hither and yon and I remember the emptiness of the sky that day and the days after.

I look at the contrails and I remember the smoke rising from where the towers had been that day and the days after.

I look at the contrails and I remember.

Cousin Muszka 1964 - 2012

My cousin died Monday night in Paris after a long and valiant struggle with cancer.

Born September 18, 1964, in Paris, Cousin Muszka (family nickname, I didn't make it up) glowed with life.

Muszka (left), at 2 months old, meeting my sister (center) for the first time. Her  mother (right) supervises. My sister is 14 months old in this picture.

She had wonderful almost-black curls, dark brown eyes, and deep dimples. Her laughter was infectious. She was fluent in at least 3 languages, spoke French with a Parisian accent, and English with a Brooklyn accent. It was hilarious to hear her talking to her mom going back and forth between French and English in the same sentence.

Muszka at play. I don't know when or where this picture was taken.

Whenever she came to visit, she and my sister were inseparable. They were as close as two people who are usually separated by an ocean could be.

Muszka and my sister, probably in March of 1969, when I was born.

I don't remember being jealous of their closeness at all, but I do remember wishing I were older and could be like them.

Passover, 1972. From left: Me, my sister, Muszka.

Passover weekend 1972. Back porch of my mom's house. From left: Muszka, my sister, me.

Muszka often came for long visits in the Summer, and for shorter ones in the Winter. It was like having another sister, one who lived far away sometimes.

Summer of 1978. We are on the porch of a house on Fisher Beach in Cape Cod. From Left, Muszka, my sister, me.

Muszka on a winter visit. My sister's room.

Muszka was a professor of American History at a University in Paris. She was highly regarded in her field. She has a beautiful, smart, wonderful 14-year-old daughter (I couldn't find a picture of the two of them together this morning).

I believe this is from my grandma's 80th birthday party. From left: Grandma, Muszka, my aunt (her mom).

She leaves behind an empty space.

July 1989. My sister's wedding. 

I will miss her so much.

Christmas memory

The first Christmas after my parents separated, my sister and I spent Christmas Eve at my Dad's place, a rail-road apartment on 11th? 12th? Street in Park Slope.

We shared a bedroom there, and my dad had painted a bright and cheerful rainbow on the wall above my bed. My sister's side of the room had this magical built-in cupboard, with drawers underneath.

So, it's the night before Christmas. The first Christmas we weren't a whole family. I couldn't sleep. BigSister couldn't sleep. We were whispering and speculating and wondering if Santa knew where we would be. Did we remember to give him this address? Would it confuse him that we were going to be switching houses? We just. couldn't. sleep.

So BigSister said, "you know, when EldestCousin babysat for me a while ago, I asked him to tuck me in and he didn't know how. Here! Let me show you what he did!"

And she bounced up out of bed, and came over to my side of the room and pulled the covers up to my chin and then went "TUCK!TUCK!TUCK!" and tucked the blankets in around my body like you would tuck a flat sheet under a mattress.

And then she went back to her bed. And I bounced up (after detangling myself) and I went over to HER side of the room and I pulled the covers up to her chin and went "TUCK!TUCK!TUCK!" and tucked the blankets in around her body like you would tuck a flat sheet under a mattress.

And then I went back to my bed and she bounced up (after detangling herself) and....well, lather, rinse, repeat about seven times. We were HOWLING with laughter. And it became a Christmas tradition that we continued for years.

The moral of the story is that even the most difficult holidays can bring fun memories, and build new traditions. I don't remember what I got for Christmas that year, but I remember that night with my sister.

The worst day of the year.

Tomorrow is election day and so, of course, Muffin Man will be staying overnight tonight with a babysitter so that Mr. Spock and I can be at our volunteer posts at 0530 in the cold, dark morning.

We'll be at our posts all day (with a short break to go to our own polling place to vote), and then we'll go to a watch party and, depending on how long it takes, we'll probably be home after MM's bedtime (his sitter will bring him to our house after his holiday camp's field trip tomorrow, and stay there with him until we get home).

This is the part of being involved in elections I hate. Not seeing my son for two whole days (though I'm volunteering at the sitter's polling place, so I'll actually see him when she comes to vote).

There's no doubt in my mind that what I'm doing is worth it, that this is how a democracy continues, that I'm teaching my son how much I value our system. But I'm not going to lie to you, Monday before an election when there's a chance I may not see that sweet boy until Wednesday morning? It's the worst day of the year.

Where have I been?

I've been posting at Doorbell Queen, I've been working, and I've been on hold with several folks.

A couple weeks ago, I got a mammogram here at work. CONVENIENT! But, because they did your basic mammogram (2 pictures per breast), I got the call I always get when I get a basic mammogram...which is that they saw something weird and would I go get more thoroughly checked?

And here's where it's less convenient, because normally, I'd just go back to where I went to get the basic, but they're a traveling group, so I can't.

So I've been on the phone with my doctor, and a specialist, and the traveling folks in NJ. And the upshot is that they're going to FedEx the films to the specialist and I'll have an appointment a week from tomorrow (and I'll bring the films from 2 years ago), and lesson learned. From now on, I get all my mammograms from the local radiologists.

As always, this shit makes me a little anxious, but since every. single. time. I get a mammogram, I have to go for follow-up and they haven't found anything yet - I'm just large and fibrous - I'm not as anxious as you'd expect.

9/12

Yesterday I was full of thoughts of 10 years ago, as I guess we all were. I've posted about that beautiful blue day many times. Today, I'm just going to post links to those past ones, to a few from the past few days by blogging friends of mine, and to the sermon from the services I went to yesterday.

What I wrote:

• Lorisa Ceylon Taylor, age 31. Died 9/11/2001 
• Out of a Clear Blue Sky
(and 3 more exactly like this one)
• The Mourning Sky
• Vanessa Lynn Kolpak, age 21. Died 9/11/2001

What others wrote:

• The Hand of God
• The Gathering Place - Remembering those with Disabilities on 9/11
• 9/12

What others said:

• Interfaith sermon at Unitarian Universalists of Sterling

May peace be with you.

iPhone vs. Droid: The Views of a Reluctant Adopter, one day later.

So, 11 days ago, I got a Droid X2 to replace my Droid Eris, which died an ignoble death (dropped from a height onto uneven pavement. Smash).

So I went and got the Droid X2, and a serious protector for it.

The Droid X2 has a lot to recommend it. Large screen. Fast everything. On the down-side, it's big and heavy and doesn't easily fit into any pockets I own. But, since I generally carry around a purse anyway, that wasn't a deal breaker. I was really very happy with the Droid X2 - when it was working.

And therein was the rub. Five times in the ten days I owned that phone, it crashed. Needed a hard-reset type of crashed. To perform a hard reset on the Droid X2, you need to remove and replace the battery. Which was covered by the serious protector, that was so serious it was nigh unto impossible to remove. Now maybe you don't think five major crashes in ten days is a lot, but I do. So back to the store I went. And this time I got an iPhone 4. (I had considered getting a different Droid, but I'm starting to have doubts about their quality control).

So let's talk about the iPhone 4. There is a lot I like about it, but I'm having a bit of trouble adjusting to other parts of it. How do you download music from Amazon's cloud onto to it? How do you set your In Case of Emergency numbers? How do you import contacts from, say, Facebook, without sending contacts TO Facebook? Can you set the current weather to be visible at all times on your main screen? How do you teach it to be quicker to suggest words (like your email address) when you're typing?

These things were easy in the Droid.

Things I like better in the iPhone: speed, screen sensitivity, camera, the phone itself. I'm sure that as I learn to do the other things I want to do, I'll stop wishing it would do things like the Droid did, but I hate the learning curve.

First world problems, much? What's new in your life?

Writing about other people

Please keep my Grandma in your thoughts. She broke her hip on Friday, and while she is recovering well and is in good spirits, she's 92 and has a long stretch of rehabilitation to go through.

Meanwhile, one of the people I write about here has asked me not to post stories involving this person without prior permission.

This is making it difficult for me to post.

It is summer, blog fodder is occurring daily if not hourly, and I...can't post any of it.

Book reviews and outfit blogging will be increasing. Now is a good time for suggestions for things to blog about!

Thinking of Jimmy Dugan

A high school friend of mine went missing last week, when a dock he was on collapsed, and now they think they've found his body.


He was a person who was full of life, made friends easily, and will be sorely missed.

I've been waiting 30 years for this day

New Car

Well, a new used car.

A very low-mileage 1998 Toyota Camry. 4 doors, I can see over the steering wheel and reach the pedals without needing to turn off the airbag. Green with beige interior.

It's nimble and just the right size for the three of us.

So.

Staples and stitches come out Tuesday.

I am really very grateful that it wasn't worse. It could have been so much worse.

Car Recommendation

I don't know if you're in the market for a mini-van, but if you are, I can heartily recommend the Kia Sedona.

I am 4'11" and can comfortably drive the Sedona. The driver's seat is adjustable to allow a person as short as I am to reach the pedals, see over the steering wheel, and still sit far enough away from the wheel to not have to shut off the airbag. My husband, at 5'10", also found it comfortable to drive.

I have been able to fit seven people in the car (6 adults and a child), and it seats 6 very comfortably.

And...

Ours was totalled.

Totalled.

And my son, who was in the car, (driver's side, middle set of seats) is totally fine. Not a scratch, not a bruise.

My only injury (aside from a couple of bruises), was from hitting my head on the place where the seatbelt attaches to the wall of the car.

We were both wearing our seatbelts, but the car did what it was supposed to do. My car is a wreck, it will be sold for scrap, but we are fine.

So. If you're in the market for a mini-van. I recommend the Kia Sedona.

And I'm glad to be able to do so.

Thinking about my Grandpa Emeritus

He died three years ago this month (Fifth of August), and I'm missing him.

On Sunday, the pastor at our UU congregation gave a really moving address about the cathedral of the world, and life and death. It was something my grandfather would have enjoyed listening to.

Here's a post I wrote about a conversation I had with my son during one of our last visits with my grandfather.

I really wish people we love could live forever.

Today, I'm just happy. Very happy.

Yesterday, Judge Walker Vaughn overturned Prop 8 in California. Yesterday, my Twitter feed exploded with joy, laughter, and relief.

Today, I'm sending out love to all my gay and lesbian friends and family members, and hope - such a big hope - that this verdict will be upheld by the 9th circuit and by the Supremes. And thus overturn my own state's Jim Crow amendment.

I can't wait to live in a country where any two consenting adults can marry each other.

We went camping.

Perfect weather. 75 and sunny. Not humid. It rained in the middle of the night. Poured, actually. We stayed snug and dry in the tent. The sun was out and the tent dried completely before we packed it up.

Hotdogs, hamburgers, s'mores for dinner.

Bacon, eggs, and toast for breakfast. And french-pressed coffee. We're not savages.

Farm stands, and diners, and ice cream, and inexpensive gasoline.

Badminton, and batting practice, and Rummy 500, and Labyrinth.

And the views. HOLY GUACAMOLE, the views. Turns out, the Shenandoahs have good reason to be such a big deal, who knew?

Pictures coming later. Both MS and MM took some.

I took along an appropriate book, but I didn't get much chance to read it at the campsite.

I did read some more of The Magician's Nephew to MM.

Neither book I've linked to is the edition I own.

What did you do over the weekend?

He Makes Decisions and Braves the Consequences: Random Bullets of Muffin Man

• These are the sandals he picked out for the summer. "Purple is a power color!" and he faced down the one rotten kid who teased him about the color.


• He loves his shorn head. Will probably not grow it back to the former unruly curliness. Lo, I am sad. But also happy. It's his hair, his choice.


• He is standing up for himself to a longtime friend who is acting badly toward him. I'm sad that the friendship may end (the friend is going through rough times at home), but am so happy that MM won't stand for abuse. "I am DONE with that."
  


• Only two more weeks of school for him, then he's a 3rd Grader.

Seen outside Chipotle

Our local Chipotle is next to an old grave. On Thursday, my work team ate there and sitting perched on the headstone, was a crow. In the tree over the grave, another crow.

It was completely Poe-esque. With a side of Gary Larson.

Six days ago...

Was my five-year blogiversary. And I missed it.

Blogged twice since then, and didn't notice.

However, TODAY is the fifth anniversary of the first time someone linked to this blog. So HAPPY LINKIVERSARY TO ME!!!

Adventures in Cafeteria Food

Today the cafeteria choices were, to put it mildly, abysmal. I ended up getting a mushroom swiss burger, which the grillman made with american cheese. Despite that, the burger was pretty good, but the fries were soggy and just meh.

Contrast that with my lunch from yesterday...which was leftover homemade spicy ginger peanut chicken. Which I ate in my own kitchen. Because I work 4 miles from home. I think I need to do that more.