What is my grandma going to do? She was married to [Grandpa Emeritus] for almost 50 years.
Well, I got my answer.
- She's visited my sister in Vermont for the first time in 11 years.
- She went to my parent's country house for a while.
- She went to her sister's country house for a while.
- She's going to see both her sisters in California for 6 weeks.
- She's doing things he wasn't able to do and she wouldn't do without him.
I hadn't realized how much of her life was bounded by the limitations imposed on her by his various illnesses. Part of their independence (living in their own apartment without home health aides) was predicated on their being close to quality medical care. The mere fact of his age (not to mention his health history and his bags) made any hospitalization a big deal and what if that hospitalization were to happen away from home? What if it dragged on for months?
Grandma is, for 89, a VERY healthy person. She's got some high blood pressure and some osteoporosis, but other than that, she's in great shape. She also knows that she's got to grab her chance to do these things NOW or she may not be able to do them later. She's paying 11 years' worth of visits, doing 11 years' worth of travel, having 11 years' worth of adventures.
When he was able, they loved to travel together. They went all over the world. They made life every day an adventure together. The two of them could make shopping for fresh vegetables at the farmer's market into a trip to an exotic destination and that spirit did not die with my grandfather. It lives with zeal in my Grandma.
She's my hero.