Sunday, April 13, 2008

I think it's called TMI.

So I bought some new bras yesterday (34 Ginormous). And new shirts today (XL). And I have to tell you people that there is only one time when I don't like my body - when I'm buying clothes for it.

As you all know, I'm short. Short. Fifty-nine inches in my stocking feet. My arms are in proportion to that. My bodacious tatas not so much.

How to buy a shirt that doesn't gap in the front and, at the same time, doesn't make me look like I raided my husband's closet? And that I can afford?

Well, the Merona shirts come close to perfection on those points. The XL is a tad bit too long in the torso for me, but not so much that it looks bad. It's got princess seaming so it doesn't look like a man's shirt. It satisfies the "no pockets" rule (never, ever wear a shirt with pockets on it if you have a bosom the size of a small country). The sleeves are about 2 inches too long, but they have a long cuff that folds tidily without being obvious. And they're $18.00.

They come in an elbow-sleeve version, but that actually looked like crap on me. I think elbow sleeves draw attention to my bust line.

Finding a bra that fits, is supportive, and doesn't have a seam across the front was a true adventure. The Fantasie 4500 seems to fill the bill quite nicely. I liked my Wacoal minimizer better but, alas, Wacoal doesn't make it for the G market. Neither is the Fantasie 4500 as lovely as my Fayreform Daisy (in chocolate), but the Daisy is not smooth. It draws attention to itself under light solid colors and thin fabrics. And even the cream version has pink details on it which show under a white shirt.

Last year (seriously, almost to the day), the whole process made me feel horrible about myself. This year, I just feel frustrated at the lack of choices. It's not me, it's the lack of choice in clothing sizes. Thank God for the HAES movement. It's made all the difference to my mood this time.

I don't have any of the usual front-loaded problems, either. No backaches, very little gouging in the shoulders, generally no angry red marks all over (the result of wearing the right bra and not slouching...when you're not quite five-feet tall, you tend to stand up straight).

I do want to put y'all on alert, though. A time is coming when my breasts are going to be a big enough pain in my ass that I'm going to want to take them down a notch or two - but only if I can be reasonably sure that they'd stay there. And y'all? Still leaking. 5+ years post pumping.


debangel said...

OK, so now we *totally* need to be shopping together! (I"m 5'8" and a 34FF but that just makes for less competition on sale items!) Too bad you're a 34 and not a 36, b/c I have a couple almost-new 36s that are too big for me now. Have you tried Freya bras? Same company as Fantasie but sizing is slightly different- an F in Fantasie is a FF in Freya. They make super-cute swimsuits, too.

Is it me or are the Merona shirts sized a tad small? I wear a medium in everything but only the large would fit me in that style..but I really liked it! Stoopid button-down shirts that require tailoring. ::sigh::

Maybe we could get a two-for-one (four-for two?) deal on some perky new girls..or at least split tailoring costs??

liz said...

I'm in! That'd be great.

Ramblin' Red said...

I will never gripe about my bra issues (38 B is usally a smidge difficult to find, as usually B cups are not such wide women) again. You have given me perspective.

liz said...

Red, sweetheart, bitching about bras is always appropriate.

We come in all shapes and sizes. It'd be nice if the manufacturers and retailers would actually make bras in the sizes we come in. Instead, if you're not a 34 or 26 C, you're shit out of luck in most cases.

kathy a. said...

i hate shopping for clothes, too. and bras. and clothes -- i have a very few inches on you in height, but short arms and, um, not the body of a supermodel.

nobody tells you about the body stuff that counts. i was not a champion breastfeeder, but could still express a little something 10 years after relevance. ok, weird of me to check and see, time to time, but how come my body did that? geesh, tmi.

Andrea said...

32E. I have found one store that stocks my size. Fortunately, it is across the street. Unfortunately, they cost a freaking fortune. So annoying.

Otherwise--I have given up on shirts with buttons. It's spandex all the way. And it's tough because I refuse to buy a shirt that doesn't fit in the shoulder and stretches too much across the bust, which rules out a lot of them.

Still leaking! I stopped a month or two after weaning. Wow.

Eva said...

LEAKING? Shit, mine didn't even do that when I WAS breastfeeding.

I have 32H breasts which, contrary to what everybody else thinks, seem quite reasonably sized to me. Anyway, I have a three of the same exact 90 dollar bras. They are lacy and have a huge seam and make my breasts a little cone-shaped, but you would not BELIEVE the lift. They are AWESOME. My breasts could not be any higher. Prima Donna.

KLee said...

I hear ya on the bodacious ta-tas. Girl -- that's why I don't ride horses --(Well, beyond flattening the poor things into pancakes...)I'd give myself two back eyes in minutes from all the flopping going on!

I know your pain. I'm a 52DD. If I were any shorter, I'd be top heavy. An effing Weeble.

as for the clothes, my main question is why, Oh God, WHY -- do the makers of clothing seem intent on putting ribbons, ruches, or some other boobular ornamentation on clothing for the well-endowed, and/or the heavy? I hate it, I tell you!

kathy a. said...

oh, well klee has me going now. what is WITH these clothes that have criss-cross front thingies? or bands under the boobs? no thanks, i'd rather not pop out of my clothing today! or draw more attention to that part. do clothing designers employ actual women? that is what i want to know.

Suburban Turmoil said...

Seriously? Still leaking? Seriously?

I need to be refitted, but the whole idea of doing it is too embarrassing.

purple_kangaroo said...

I don't wear blouses with pockets, either . . . I have narrow shoulders and a small chest, so on me the pockets are always several inches too low.

Does any woman actually look good in pocket-front shirts? Why doesn't somebody start designing clothes that actually flatter normal people?

liz said...

Yep. Still leaking. Not enough to show through a shirt, but enough to put a dark spot on my bra which washes out.

I can still express a bit, too.