Going to the chapel

My sister-in-law is getting married down in Tampa over the weekend. Muffin Man will be a ring bearer. I'm leaving tomorrow and won't be back until Tuesday. Have fun y'all!!!

As seen everywhere!!!

Go to MusicOutfitters, and in the Search box enter the year of your high school graduation. You can then click on a link to the top songs from that year. Then bold the songs you like, underline your favorite, strike out the ones you hate, and leave untouched the ones you don't remember or don't care about.

1987 was not a great year, musically. Sigh. But I looooooooved Big Time.

1. Walk Like An Egyptian, Bangles
2. Alone, Heart
3. Shake You Down, Gregory Abbott
4. I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me), Whitney Houston
5. Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now, Starship
6. C'est La Vie, Robbie Nevil
7. Here I Go Again, Whitesnake
8. The Way It Is, Bruce Hornsby and the Range
9. Shakedown, Bob Seger
10. Livin' On A Prayer, Bon Jovi
11. La Bamba, Los Lobos (but not as much as the original)
12. Everybody Have Fun Tonight, Wang Chung
13. Don't Dream It's Over, Crowded House
14. Always, Atlantic Starr
15. With Or Without You, U2
16. Looking For A New Love, Jody Watley
17. Head To Toe, Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam
18. I Think We're Alone Now, Tiffany
19. Mony Mony, Billy Idol (but not as much as the original)
20. At This Moment, Billy Vera and The Beaters
21. Lady In Red, Chris De Burgh
22. Didn't We Almost Have It All, Whitney Houston
23. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For, U2
24. I Want Your Sex, George Michael I'm embarrassed to admit it.
25. Notorious, Duran Duran
26. Only In My Dreams, Debbie Gibson
27. (I've Had) The Time Of My Life, Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes
28. The Next Time I Fall, Peter Cetera and Amy Grant
29. Lean On Me, Club Nouveau (again, original's better)
30. Open Your Heart, Madonna (yeah, yeah, sue me.)
31. Lost In Emotion, Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam
32. (I Just) Died In Your Arms, Cutting Crew
33. Heart And Soul, T'pau
34. You Keep Me Hangin' On, Kim Wilde
35. Keep Your Hands To Yourself, Georgia Satellites
36. I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me), Aretha Franklin and George Michael
37. Control, Janet Jackson
38. Somewhere Out There, Linda Ronstadt and James Ingram ick, ick, ick
39. U Got The Look, Prince
40. Land Of Confusion, Genesis
41. Jacob's Ladder, Huey Lewis and The News
42. Who's That Girl, Madonna
43. You Got It All, Jets
44. Touch Me (I Want Your Body), Samantha Fox
45. I Just Can't Stop Loving You, Michael Jackson and Siedah Garrett
46. Causing A Commotion, Madonna
47. In Too Deep, Genesis
48. Let's Wait Awhile, Janet Jackson
49. Hip To Be Square, Huey Lewis and the News
50. Will You Still Love Me?, Chicago
51. Little Lies, Fleetwood Mac
52. Luka, Suzanne Vega
53. I Heard A Rumour, Bananarama
54. Don't Mean Nothing, Richard Marx
55. Songbird, Kenny G
56. Carrie, Europe
57. Don't Disturb This Groove, System
58. La Isla Bonita, Madonna
59. Bad, Michael Jackson Again, sue me.
60. Sign 'O' The Times, Prince
61. Change Of Heart, Cyndi Lauper
62. Come Go With Me, Expose
63. Can't We Try, Dan Hill
64. To Be A Lover, Billy Idol
65. Mandolin Rain, Bruce Hornsby and the Range
66. Breakout, Swing Out Sister
67. Stand By Me, Ben E. King
68. Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Genesis
69. Someday, Glass Tiger
70. When Smokey Sings, ABC
71. Casanova, Levert
72. Rhythm Is Gonna Get You, Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine
73. Rock Steady, Whispers
74. Wanted Dead Or Alive, Bon Jovi
75. Big Time, Peter Gabriel
76. The Finer Things, Steve Winwood
77. Let Me Be The One, Expose
78. Is This Love, Survivor
79. Diamonds, Herb Alpert
80. Point Of No Return, Expose
81. Big Love, Fleetwood Mac
82. Midnight Blue, Lou Gramm
83. Something So Strong, Crowded House
84. Heat Of The Night, Bryan Adams
85. Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You, Glenn Medeiros
86. Brilliant Disguise, Bruce Springsteen
87. Just To See Her, Smokey Robinson
88. Who Will You Run Too, Heart
89. Respect Yourself, Bruce Willis
90. Cross My Broken Heart, Jets 91.
Victory, Kool and The Gang
92. Don't Get Me Wrong, Pretenders
93. Doing It All For My Baby, Huey Lewis and The News
94. Right On Track, Breakfast Club
95. Ballerina Girl, Lionel Richie
96. Meet Me Half Way, Kenny Loggins
97. I've Been In Love Before, Cutting Crew
98. (You Gotta) Fight For Your Right To Party, Beastie Boys
99. Funkytown, Pseudo Echo
100. Love You Down, Ready For The World

Dances with Minivans tagged me

I've been tagged by Dances with Minivans! Here's what I have to do:
List five songs that you are currently digging - it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions and the five songs (with artist) in your blog. Then tag five people to see what they're listening to.

Holiday - Green Day
Franz Liszt, the Famous Pianist - Beethovan's Wig
LY - Tom Lehrer/Electric Company
Walking on Broken Glass - Annie Lennox
Here Comes the Grump - Adam Ant

I don't know who's already been tagged with this one, so if you haven't been, and you want to be, TAG! YOU'RE IT!

Drop-off update

He stayed in his old room all day yesterday and is in the new room with the new teacher today (new for him, she's been at the school for years). He sobbed when I left him there, but I went down the hall and waited and the sobbing stopped. I watched the class on the tv in Miss Director's office and could see him moving around, clutching his two stuffed dogs (Big Worf and Little Worf). I hope he does okay today.

Sigh.

Thank you all for your good thoughts yesterday. I feel so petty obsessing about this after what Katrina did to Louisiana and Mississippi.

It's hard to drive with tears in your eyes

Muffin Man has spent the last 18 months or so in one classroom at his daycare. He's had mostly the same teachers for that whole time.

All summer he was so excited about moving up into the next class (his best friend is there) and being a big boy.

Until today.

"No, Mommy! I want to go to MY room. I don't want to go in this room. This isn't my room! Mommy! Don't leave me! No! No! NOOOOO!"

It didn't help that I was not actually dropping him off in his new room because the teachers for that room don't arrive today until 11:00. Eventually, I let him go back into his old room until his new teachers come in. Then I had to pry his fingers off my neck.

I ended up putting my watch in his pocket. "See, Muffin Man? You have Mommy's watch. Mommy's watch will be with you all day. I'll come and pick you up later. It will all be okay."

"Bring my blanket back in here!!!!" (I'd taken his nap-time gear into the new room, his blanket is a quilt that QuiltsAlot made for him, and he has a flannel sheet too. He snuggles into them at naptime and reads a book quietly because heaven forbid he should actually take a nap at school.)

"Miss Director will bring it to you later. Big hugs and kisses now."

And so I got my hugs and kisses, but boy howdy, was it ever hard to leave him.

Pretty good weekend here

Though I worked most of it. Feh.

We took the safety knob off of Muffin Man's door, he now gets up in the morning and tiptoes into our room, uses the potty and then comes and snuggles with us. We can hear his door open and we watch for him to come in. He pokes his head through the door first and then moves his whole body in once he sees the coast is clear.

He took a really great bath tonight. Very cooperative and happy. Tomorrow he starts in a new classroom at daycare, so exciting!

Poooooooooop!

Yes, Muffin Man did it. He pooped in the potty this morning. He sat there for about 10 minutes "reading" a book, while I was in the next room doing some ironing. He called us in to look and we all admired that adult-sized poop sitting in the adult-sized toilet in our bathroom. I couldn't be prouder.

Muffin Man got a very big sheet of stickers for his very big accomplishment.

Starting to drag

I woke up this morning at 4:00 (combination fizzy brain and sprinkler system starting up). I tried to fall back asleep and finally gave it up at 5:00. Got up, brushed my teeth, decided not to risk waking anyone by taking a shower, got my clothes and got dressed in the guest room. Did some reading of the Washington Post and you bloggers and left, getting to work at 6:15 (and I wasn't the first one here).

I do have a lot of work to do, but I'm starting to drag. The cookies in the cafeteria are stale and coffee's just not doing it for me today. I'm not feeling sleep deprived so much as just bleh.

Memories of being pregnant

Secret Agent Josephine has a post about her first flutter and Brooklyn Girl has a post about feeling like something out of Aliens. And so I've been remembering feeling Muffin Man move around when I was pregnant with him and one particular moment that still gets me giggling.

I was working up until the last day and about a month before I was due, I was standing in a friend's cube, talking about a shower gift she was giving to another pregnant friend. I was standing about 2 feet away from my friend (the one on the right), she was sitting down and her face was about on a level with the top of my huge tummy. While we were talking MM decided to switch positions. On my left side a large bulge popped out of my tummy, slid over to just above my belly button and - whooosh! - disappeared. My friend nearly fell over. She slid her chair as far away from me as she could get.

She still shudders thinking about it.

Dang it! APL got the good title!

We hired a sitter tonight, since Mr. Spock was going to a meeting and I just couldn't miss seeing Corndog play at a local coffee house/pub sort of place. Just. Couldn't. Miss. It.

So, I go to meet APL there and since I got there first, I claimed a table and then started scoping out the musician-type people. Which one would it be? It couldn't be the tall, blonde one sitting at the table next to me. Wrong sex. What about the guy helping out with the sound check? No. He's starting at 7:00 and Corndog starts at 8:00. And besides, he doesn't look like he's out of college and Corndog has two toddlers. And a job. Hey, that guy talking to the sound guy looks like he just said [Corndog's Real Name]. Could it be him? Should I go and ask? But what if it's not? Then I'll look kind of weird, or like I'm picking him up or something.....

Oh! There's APL! I point out my pick for Corndog, she agrees he's a good bet. Right age. Sitting alone. So we go and get some yummy food and go back to our table - actually we decide on a different one and before I could ask her if we should go and talk to our pick, the 7:00 guy starts playing (not bad). And then the tall, blonde chick (Tori Amos wannabe, not bad). The shy, nervous, mousy girl (needs voice lessons, but wrote some good stuff). The cute older, hippy couple (big bass played by a small woman, big man playing small guitar). The southern college boys (good writing, not-so-great singing, and the singer didn't remember the words to his own songs). The guy in the aloha shirt (we thought he was a possible Corndog, but nope). And then...our pick! IT WAS HIM! And boy howdy, can he play! And sing! And write! He's got chops. We shouted and whistled and called out, "CORNDOG!!!"

Then we three sat and talked for over an hour and through a power outage about kids and jobs and commutes and carseats and daycare and zoos and visiting in-laws and whether one person can visit with three different groups of people in one weekend.

If any of you get a chance to see Corndog play, don't miss it. He's great on his blog, but he's even better in person.

Muffin Man and Backyard Girl

We have neighbors who live behind us. They have a little girl who is 5 months younger than Muffin Man. Backyard Girl is Muffin Man's best friend outside of school. He loooooooves her. Yesterday we spent part of the afternoon with her and her Dad at the neighborhood pool and then she came over and helped us make and eat ice cream. MM showed her all his toys and shared his play-doh accessories like a real gentleman. He even shared his scissors with her. This is a really big deal. Seriously.

At the pool, BYG was SWIMMING in the pool. Face in the water and everything. She would jump in and go over her head and then bob up with her head back so her hair would do that perfect-down-the-back thing. She's three! Her dad told us where they take her for lessons, so we'll be taking MM there next Spring.

Comment spam is getting up my nose.

And so I'm following the herd with word verification on comments. Please let me know if this is a huge hassle.

We went to the zoo.

Angry Pregnant Lawyer, Angry Boy (who's really not an angry boy at all. He's so delicious, I could just eat him up, toes and all), Muffin Man and I went to the National Zoo yesterday morning. We had a great time walking around, up hills and down, looking at all the animals we could see. Many of them were sleeping, including a panda bear - all stretched out on its back, scratching its tummy occasionally.

Muffin Man's favorite was the hippo. "The little one or the big one?" I asked. "THE BIG ONE!!!" he shouted. The little one, a pygmy hippo, could have fit in the big one's mouth.

I'm pretty sure that AB's favorite was the river otter. He shrieked with joy everytime it swam near him.

My favorites were the flamingos, so beautifully pink! It's amazing to see something that vibrantly pink occur in nature. Muffin Man wanted to see them play with a yo-yo*.

We also saw a capybara (the world's largest rodent). Those of you who are fans of The Tick may remember that he adopted a capybara, mistaking it for a dog. But really, what they look like is a very, very large hamster -- about 3 feet long and two feet high. It takes a python all of 5 months to digest one.

After the zoo we went out for lunch and APL and I shared two very yummy dishes, a sure sign, we agreed, that we could stay friends with each other. After all, how can you be friends with someone who won't trade bites?

We both kicked ourselves for forgetting to bring cameras (doh!)

And I swear, the parking karma we had was extraordinary. We got a spot right next to the entrance across from the elephants, and at the restaurant we got a spot right near the door. It was amazing.

*You know, from the bit in Fantasia 2000. What do you mean you haven't seen it? Honestly, people!

Happy Birthday, Big Sister!

BigSisterBirthday
Originally uploaded by Mystery Mommy.

I still look up to you. You are so important to me. My life would be so much poorer if I didn't have you. My admiration for you today is as strong (maybe stronger) as it was 33 years ago when this picture was taken.

Love you always.

Transcript of a conversation

MM: "Mommy, I don't want to give Daddy a cracker"
Me: "Well, you don't have to....unless you offered it to him. Did you offer it to him?"
MM: "Yes. But then I ate it."
Me: "But Muffin Man, that's teasing. Teasing isn't nice. It makes people feel bad."
MM: "But it's in my tummy!"
Me: "Yes, I know. But you have to go and tell Daddy that you're sorry you teased him. I think he probably feels bad that you teased him."
MM: "Okay. No teasing."

Now, it didn't end up being quite that easy, but I think we're making progress on what teasing is and why we shouldn't do it. And we're also making progress on why we don't hit people. Muffin Man is discovering how much power he has, and we need to teach him how to use that power for good.

Seen at Dances with Minivans

Take the quiz: "Which Greek god/goddess are you?"

Hermes
You are Hermes! Hermes was the messenger god.Hermes was known for his helpfulness to mankind, both in his capacity as immortal herald and on his own initiative. When Perseus set out to face the Gorgon Medusa, Hermes aided him in the quest. According to one version of the myth, he loaned the hero his own magic sandals, which conferred upon the wearer the ability to fly.

Pssst...hey kid, want some Harry?

I got TellsDonaldDuckStories hooked on Harry Potter. I did it with malice aforethought. I wonder what the maximum sentence is for that. On the one hand, he's not a minor. On the other hand, I know what Harry can do to an addictive personality. And TellsDonaldDuckStories is an addict: Coffee, poppy-seed bagels, and the New York Times. He's gotta have 'em and he'll travel pretty far to get 'em. Weekend visits have gotten much less tense since Starbucks started selling the NYT in all their shops.

So a few weeks ago they were down for a visit and I loaned him the first Harry Potter book. He read it during the hellacious trip home and went out and bought the whole set. And he bought another set for my neice and nephew.

I feel like a miniature version of Cyrus McPherson (nyah-haha!)*

*Cyrus McPherson was the villian in all of TellsDonaldDuckStories Donald Duck Stories (the ones he made up)

Okay, so it's not cake...

Nix on the chocolate cake this weekend, we're making sorbet and ice cream instead. Yesterday was Yellow Doll Watermelon Sorbet. Yellow Doll watermelons are yellow inside instead of red. The sorbet came out pretty good, but we added too much sugar (following a recipe for orange sorbet and forgetting that melons are loads sweeter than oranges.)

Today is strawberry-vanilla ice cream. It was going to be cherry-vanilla but we couldn't find any fresh cherries. Is the season over already?

Yesterday we spent some time shopping at a nearby farm stand. Mr. Spock is friends with a local farmer and we got some personal assistance from him picking out the best peaches and tomatoes. And we bought a dozen ears of Bread and Butter corn. Ate some last night. Having more for dinner tonight.

Muffin Man is going through yet another "Sleep with me!!!" phase. Normally I don't but last night I did (today's not a work/school day, I didn't actually go to bed until long after he was asleep, and this morning he helped me put the mattress back in the guest room and make the bed.) I don't know what is behind the sudden overwhelming desire for me to be in the room with him, but I wish he'd get over it already. He's napping now. I hope he stays asleep for at least another hour.

When he wakes up we'll put the custard into the ice cream maker and add the strawberries (half pureed, half in chunks) and let it churn for 20 - 40 minutes. After we've had some ice cream, perhaps we'll go to the pool. Then back home for dinner and bath-time. Then bed again.

Just another Sunday afternoon at the MysteryMommy house.

And the race is on!

Yesterday Morning:

Me (trying to avoid the huge whine fest of the day before): Muffin Man, if you are all dressed by the time I get out of the shower, we'll have time to watch t.v. together. Otherwise, no t.v.!
MM: Is it a race?
Me: Yes!

5 minutes later...I'm washing my dainty bits...

MM: Mommy! I'm all dressed!
Mr. Spock: He did it all by himself.

People, I'm here to tell you that he got all his clothes on correctly. And he even put on his own socks. He wore sandals with them, but we'll deal with fashion faux pas later.

So we did it again this morning (I told him he didn't have to wear socks). And again, he dressed himself correctly. Including remembering that today is Splash Day at school and he should wear his bathing trunks.

AND....He made his own cinnemon toast for breakfast this morning with only a little bit of help from me (removing the hot bread from the toaster, cutting the finished product into triangles).

My little boy. He's growing up.

Mmmmmmm....Chocolate

Friday Mom has a beautiful post that mentions, towards the end, chocolate cake with white frosting.

Now I happen to love chocolate cake with white frosting and my mom's friend gave us a recipe for a triple-threat chocolate cake which almost could kind of count as home-made. Almost. But not quite.

Triple Threat, Almost Homemade But Not Quite, Chocolate Cake

Ingredients:
1 Box Duncan Hines Devil's Food Cake
1 Box Non-instant Chocolate Pudding
4 Eggs
8 oz Sour Cream
1/2 Cup oil
1/2 Cup fresh brewed coffee
1 bag Nestle's Toll House Chocolate Chips
1 Can Vanilla frosting (or make it from scratch, whatever)

Preheat oven to 350. Grease your pan(s).

In a large mixing bowl mix all the ingredients (except for the chocolate chips) until smooth. Pour into pan(s). Pour chips into pans (try to distribute evenly). Bake until a toothpick poked it the center comes out clean (check a couple of places, you may hit a chocolate chip). Generally it takes about 5 - 10 minutes longer than the side of the cake mix box says it will take.

Let cool in the pans and then remove and let cool completely before you frost.

The original recipe called for dusting powdered sugar over it as a decoration, but come on....

About re-reading The Secret Garden -- again

One of my all-time favorite books is The Secret Garden.

It starts:
"When Mary Lennox was sent to Mistlethwaite Manor to live with her uncle everybody said she was the most disagreeable-looking child ever seen. It was true too."

Isn't that a wonderful beginning? A preface I once read, I think it was to another book, talks about the importance of getting rid of parental figures in children's literature. The problem, the author of the preface wrote, is how do you get rid of the parents without traumatizing the young reader? Most books have the children in boarding school, summer camp, visiting slightly fuzzy grandparents. Not The Secret Garden. Mary Lennox's parents die painfully of cholera in the first chapter. But it is made clear that Mary couldn't have cared less about her parents. Many people never even knew they had a child. She is a hideous child, spoiled rotten. Ten years old and still having screaming temper tantrums. What a fabulous character!

After her parents die, Mary is sent to England to live. The house she lives in has hundreds of rooms, half of them locked up. It also has extensive grounds which include a walled garden whose door was locked and the key buried ten years ago. The mystery of the garden, the strangeness of the isolated and lonely house conspire to make Mary think of something other than herself. When she finds her way into the garden and discovers the secret of Mistlethwaite Manor, she blooms along with the roses she tends.

That preface I mentioned above made another point. If Frances Hodgeson Burnett had merely called this book The Garden, it'd be a pleasant book about how gardening and exercise make you a nicer, healthier person. But by calling it The Secret Garden, by locking it away and hiding the key....now the reader is intrigued, even as our heroine is.

Thinking of a friend

A friend of mine is going through a rough time. She's ill and at home and, because I'm allergic to animal hair and she has 2 dogs and a cat, I can't go over and rub her feet and make chicken soup.

This is a friend that I met on a contract 5 jobs ago. We've been friends ever since. She babysits for Muffin Man. He calls her "Auntie [Friend's Name]." She's family.

She was bemoaning the fact that she couldn't even clean the house and so...

I asked her permission to send over and pay for a cleaning service. At first she said, "No." I argued. She was adamant. I gave up.

A little later she called me back and said, "If you were sick, I'd be doing what I could to help you. What kind of a friendship do we have if I can't accept the same in return?"

So yesterday, her house was cleaned for her. And I still feel like it's a poor substitute for chicken soup.

Does this meme remind anybody else of Monty Python & the Holy Grail?

1. What is your first name? Elizabeth

2. Were you named after anyone? Yes. But I don't remember who.

3. Do you wish on stars? Long, long ago. Now I have everything I wished for then.

4. When did you last cry? Today.

5. Do you like your handwriting? It depends. It starts out great and then degenerates into illegibility.

6. What is your favorite lunch meat? Ham.

7. What is your most embarrassing CD? Um....possibly Free to Be, You and Me. Because I bought it 2 years before I had Muffin Man. CD I'm proudest of? Pianosaurus Groovy Neighborhood.

8. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? I agree with Phantom that this question is bizarre. I hope I'd be friends with me.

9. Do you have a journal? Aside from the blog? Does writing letters to Muffin Man count?

10. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Who me? Never.

11. What are your nicknames? Liz.

12. Would you bungee jump? Not even if you paid me.

13. Do you untie your shoes before you take them off? I very rarely wear shoes with laces, but my high-top black Reeboks never get untied.

14. Do you think that you are strong? My three-year-old can out-wrestle me.

15. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate Fudge Brownie.

16. Shoe size? 7 - 7 and a half.

17. Red or pink? Red.

18. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My nail-biting.

19. What do you miss most? Wild, abandoned snugglebunnies.

20. There is no number 20.

21. What color pants/shoes are you wearing? I'm wearing neither.

22. What are you listening to right now? Law & Order/Homicide double header.

23. Last thing you ate? Chicken Caesar Salad at the local pizza joint.

24. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Huh? I'd be some discontinued color, like Burnt Sienna.

25. What is the weather like right now? 72. Mostly cloudy. 94% Humidity. We are currently between scattered showers.

26. Last person you talked to on the phone? Miss Cindy at Muffin Man's daycare.

27. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? I gotta go with Phantom Scribbler's answer here.

28. There is no number 28.

29. Favorite drink? Coffee. But I mostly drink water.

30. Favorite sport? I don't compete, but I'm a sucker for the Olympics.

31. Hair color? Brown.

32. Eye color? Hazel.

33. Do you wear contacts? Yes.

35. Last movie you watched? Aladdin.

36. Favorite day of the year? Christmas.

37. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings.

38. Winter or summer? Summer. Absolutely.

39. Hugs or kisses? Yes.

40. What is your favorite dessert? Sweetwater's chocolate waffle. And their white chocolate cheese cake. And their strawberry shortcake. APL, remember the strawberry shortcake?

41. Who is most likely to do this meme? It seems like everybody's doing it!

42. Who is the least likely to do this meme and comment? Mr. Spock.

43. What books are you reading? The Secret Garden (re-reading again).

44. What's on your mouse pad? No mouse pad.

45. What did you watch on TV last night? West Wing reruns and Miami Animal Police.

46. Favorite smells? My son's neck. Baking bread.

47. Favorite sound? Muffin Man laughing.

48. Rolling Stones or Beatles? Beatles. By a very fine hair.

49. What's the furthest you've been from your home? Japan.

50. Do you have a special talent? I can read and walk at the same time.

51. What is your ring tone? It just rings.

House Rules

Since I have just kicked out another smelly spammer and Phantom Scribbler just posted a fabulous set of Rules for Commenters, I hereby steal hers and thus include this link.

So, uh, yeah. What Phantom Scribbler said.

File Under: TMI

Let's get it on the table that I am not a prude. I performed in the Rocky Horror Picture Show Floor show as Janet, Magenta, Columbia, AND FRANK. I did that for over a year. NOT. A. PRUDE.

But I think that if the bridesmaids are going to invite the bride's future mother-in-law and present sister-in-law to a shower, it's preferable for it not to be themed "Sex Around the House".

I come and stand by every door.

Mr. Spock has a post that reminded me of the song the title of this post is from. It's a song I learned in the first sleep-away camp I went to (ages 7 & 8). Let's call it Camp Guilt.

I come and stand by every door
Though none can hear my silent tread
I knock and yet remain unseen
For I am dead, I am dead

It's about Hiroshima and the children who died there. We sang it every Hiroshima Day and after singing it, we would put origami cranes out to float on the lake. For a long time that was really all I knew about Hiroshima.

Later on, my school took us on a field trip to the UN. There's a fabulous museum there with exhibits on the Holocaust and Hiroshima. One image I'll never forget is a photograph of a sidewalk in Hiroshima with a man's shadow permanently stained onto the concrete. I can't imagine the amount of light and heat it would take to cause that. It's so hard to believe that human beings could create a weapon that can melt rocks, vaporize people and animals, and cause horrific cancers and then use it. It's even harder to believe that we used it twice.

What Kind of Food Am I?

Adding to our nightly ritual is a little routine (during the back-pat phase) called, "tell me all the foods I am."

Me: "Are you my little pumpkin?"
MM: "No." (laughing after each no.)
Me: "Are you my little strawberry?" (really, he should be considering how many of them he eats)
MM: "No."
Me: "Are you my little kumquat?" (don't you love the word "kumquat"?)
MM: "No."
Me: " Are you my little nectarine?"
MM: "No."

This goes on for a while, with him throwing out suggestions for what kind of food he is until finally he says, "That's enough, Mommy."

Me: "Are you my Big [Muffin Man's Real Name] Boy?"
MM: "YES!"

Then we do the whole kissing, hugging, "Night-night" thing and he goes to sleep. When it goes on too long, I have to really cudgel my brains to come up with foods. Often, I suggest pastries. I've actually been reduced to asking if he's a lobster or a veal scallopini. Hey! You've gotta be creative!

D'Oh!!!!

This morning started off pretty good. Mr. Spock and I got up on time, he took a shower, then I took a shower. He started getting Muffin Man ready while I dressed. I was looking sharp in my red suit (pants and blazer, a lovely nose-bleed red) with my black cami underneath the blazer. We go downstairs for breakfast (Kashi Go-Lean Crunch with milk, and coffee. WW 4.5 points.) I take off my blazer so as not to spill skim milk all over it, something I am quite capable of. I clear the table and Mr. Spock and Muffin Man go tootling off to daycare in the Spock-mobile. I lock up the house and head off to work, arriving fifteen minutes later, in good time for my nine o'clock meeting.

Y'all know what happened right? I'm going into detail here. WHAT HAVE I LEFT BACK AT HOME?

The blazer. It's on the back of my chair in the kitchen. It is now 8:35. I don't have time to go back for it. I will have to go to the meeting wearing my red pants and my black cami. I'm mortified. It's not that I don't look okay. I do. It's that, what with my figure and all, a black cami is not...appropriate office wear. It just isn't.

I go to the meeting. As soon as the meeting is over I rush home to get the blazer and rush back. Phew. I resolve to never take it off again.

Which is why there's a big Shepherd's Pie stain on it now.

Interjections!

Muffin Man's new favorite substitute for Aladdin is School House Rock. Always the real reason to watch Saturday morning cartoons for me, I have no objection but...

Now the songs in my head are Interjections and Adjectives...very distracting.

I'm also kind of preoccupied with a project I'm working on. I have to write an essay of more than 150 words about "a significant event or relationship that has influenced [me] during [my] life."

So, do I write about the hold-up, Muffin Man's birth, or the day Mr. Spock proposed to me? I thought about writing about growing up as a child of divorced parents, but let's face it, I'm 36. The divorce is OVER. I'm personally leaning toward the hold-up since it's kind of unique.

Votes?

Finally!

It's about time!

I should buy stock in Kleenex.

I'm sitting here crying for a dog I never met.